Quote Author: Dave Barry

Dave Barry – ‘I argue very well. Ask any o…

‘I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic against any opponent. People know this and steer clear of me at parties. Often as a sign of their great respect they … Continue reading

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Dave Barry – ‘American business long ago g…

‘American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking. It has even stopped hoping for employees who are educated enough that they can tell the difference between the men?s room and the women?s room … Continue reading

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Dave Barry – ‘The IRS spends God knows how…

‘The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed by IRS employees whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you ask them a real … Continue reading

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Dave Barry – ‘Dogs feel very strongly that…

‘Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.’

Quote Author: Dave Barry | Quote Genre: |

Dave Barry – ‘Karate is a form of martial …

‘Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can using only their hands and feet make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.’

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Dave Barry – ‘Gravity is a contributing fa…

‘Gravity is a contributing factor in 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.’

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Dave Barry – ‘If a woman has to choose bet…

‘If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infants life she will choose to save the infants life without even considering there are men on base.’

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Dave Barry – ‘I have always dressed accord…

‘I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules including: * Both of your socks should always be the same color * Or they should at least both be fairly dark.’

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Dave Barry – ‘Although golf was originally…

‘Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy overweight Protestants today it?s open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.’

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Dave Barry – ‘Another possible source of g…

‘Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television but televisions message has always been that the need for truth wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth and fresher breath.’

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